Creepin'

I have an adorable video of my nieces playing in my house.

The curly-haired kid starts talking about a song called Creepin.

Then, in the most adorable 3-year-old voice ever, she tells me who sings it.

"Eric Church!"

Yes, child, I know that.

I may be a tad excited about an upcoming concert in about a month. And when I say a tad, Eric Church is all I've been listening to.

...you could say I'm creepin'!

I'm particularly excited to hear this song live. It's one of my favorites.

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Like a honybee beatin' on my screen door,
I got a little buzz and my head is sore,
And from the my bed I can feel the sun,
Lord I hear the mornin' come.

Justa creepin'
Creepin', creepin', creepin'.

Shot outta hell like a bullet from a gun,
A flip of a switch,
A thief on the run,
Since the day you left me baby,
I can feel the lonely,
I can hear the crazy.

Justa creepin'
Creepin'
Justa creepin'
Creepin'

Head for the future,
Run from the past,
Hide from the mirror,
And live in a glass,
What dreams forget the whiskey remembers,
Kinda like molasses in a late December.

Justa creepin'
Creepin'
Oh, creepin'

Your cocaine kiss and caffeine love,
Got under my skin and into my blood,
That need you back comes over me,
Like ivy crawlin' up a hickory tree.

Justa creepin'
Creepin'
Justa creepin' creepin'
Creepin'

Head to the future,
Run from the past,
Hide from the mirror,
And live in a glass,
What dreams forget the whiskey remembers,
Kinda like molasses in a late December.

Justa creepin'
Creepin'
Ah, come on!

Break it down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down

Just last night I saw the light,
At the end of that tunnel on the other side,
Thought I found my way outta this pain,
Only to find your memory train.

Creepin', creepin', creepin', creepin'

Creepin', creepin', creepin', creepin'

Yeah creepin,
Creepin'

Yeah creepin'
Creepin'

Always on my mind

I can't decide if I like his voice or his looks more.

Both are pretty nice: http://www.reshareworthy.com/lukas-nelson-always-on-my-mind/

Dating advice from Monica

Why don't you put that fucking phone down?
Darling, so we could be alone now
Can't you just be here when the lights go out
Why don't you ever put that phone down?
What could be so goddamn important
That it can't wait until the morning?

My life advice: ANOTHER WOMAN. THAT'S WHAT'S SO GODDAMN IMPORTANT.

I listened to this song this morning and laughed. And now it's stuck in my head. 

Concentrate vs. Constipated

I was trying to buckle a 3-year-old in her carseat.

She was wiggling around, playing around with the peanut butter coupon she stole from my house, and generally just being a 3-year-old.

I told her in a stern voice, "Concentrate!"

I thought she would listen to me. I thought I laid down the law to this little adorable red-haired girl.

She yelled back at me: "Constipated!"

"Constipated!"

"Constipated!"

"Constipated!"

Like Grandpa said, Jesus, she can say that word clear as day.

Moon or banana?

Today my 3-year-old niece told me my moon wasn't a moon, because it was a banana instead.

Kid, I didn't go to college for art, okay?

And for the record, she's totally right. I just got schooled by a 3-year-old.

Valentines

My favorite sentence ever

"Health-care providers should help with this, but there's no guarantee that will happen."

The problem with strippers...wood strippers, that is.

There are many things that can go wrong with house projects.

It started out as a fairly simple task: To use paint stripper to remove the rest of the paint from my wood floor.

The fact that I have to do this to begin with is stupid.

Who paints a wood floor green and white, again?

Sigh.

Anyway, the first problem I encountered was removing the cap. HOW THE HELL DO YOU REMOVE THE CAP?

I Googled the problem, like any sane adult would. Dr. Google provided no help.

I sent the a photo of the cap to my Dad and BFF. Help me, I said.

BFF's husband helped by telling me to use pliers. My little pair of pink pliers did not do the trick, but I had a little laugh because I honestly thought they would work.

Then, I found this in my garage and decided to use it.

I don't even know what this is, or what it's called, but I'm pretty proud of myself for using it.

And ps, you have to take the plastic cap off first. When I was asking for help, I was actually wondering what the hell to do with the cap. A kitchen knife and about 30 minutes of thinking on my part finally did the trick.

But nowhere in the directions did it say TAKE THE PLASTIC PART OFF, YOU IDIOT.

This is why home improvement projects take so long for me. I literally run into problems before I even start.

Oh yeah, a ladder was holding up a really big board in that room. I moved the ladder, and that big board fell. Thankfully, it did not fall on me, but it could have, and I'm pretty sure it would have knocked me out and my dogs would have had to cannibalize my body just to stay alive.

I worry about things like that.

Also, my container of wood stripper was on the floor, right in the board's path. It could have splashed all over me, but the board fell onto an adjacent wall instead of flat on the ground.

I don't know if that would have killed me, but it probably would have hurt. Another ps, getting that stuff on your skin hurts.

You should wear protective clothing at all times.

Couponing

Over the last month, I've been clipping coupons and keeping an eye on sale prices and several apps on my phone.

Over the past month, I've been able to save about $80 on various groceries I've bought.

Take today, for example.

The shampoo and conditioner was on sale, two for $5. There was a $4 off digital coupon, which means I paid 50 cents for each for the shampoo and conditioner.

Sweet!

The body wash was on sale for $1.99, and I used a .75 cent digital coupon. The total before taxes was $6.99. I paid $1.75, plus tax.

I'm not a crazy couponer. My goal is to save money and make a small 'stockpile' of items that I need on a regular basis, things like soap, shampoo and conditioner, laundry and dish detergent, etc.

For every dollar that I save, that money is going into my savings account.

And that makes me pretty happy.

From the mouths of babes

Last weekend, my family and I went to an artist's reception in my hometown.

An added bonus is that my family knows the artist, so that was pretty great.

We took the twins and the baby, because why not? A guy gave the twins a guitar - a real guitar! - to play and he sat it on the ground. The twins strummed it and had a good time.

The same guy came up to me later in the night, and asked if the girls liked it. I told him yes, they did, and I asked him to play a song for them.

He agreed, and said he had a song in mind.

We gathered the three girls up, ages 3, 3 and 1, which is kind of like herding cats. We took them to a corner of the building, by a staircase, and listened to the nice man play "You are my sunshine."

You are my sunshine

My only sunshine

You make me happy

When skies are gray. 

At this point, the red-headed 3-year-old was sitting beside me on the staircase. I was trying to get her to sing along.

The little red-haired girl leaned over to me, like she wanted to whisper in my ear.

Aw, I thought. She's going to sing to me!

Her exact words: "I have to poop."

The nice man playing the guitar continued singing.

You never know dear, how much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away. 

I love kids.

Creatures of habit

I got home late last night. I did the usual night routine - let the dogs out, holler at the one who hides from me because she doesn't want to go out, let them back in, shower, turn lights off, bed.

Only, when I went to turn the lights out to go to bed, I noticed there were no Pugs in my bedroom.

What?

I let them in, right?

I went to the back of my house to investigate. I saw three Pugs sitting in a dark kitchen, looking at their food bowl.

I kicked myself for not feeding them at first. But as I moved closer, I saw that the food bowl was full of food.

My three dorks were sitting in the kitchen not eating their food because the kitchen light was not on. Once I turned the light on, they got up, wagged their tails in appreciation, ate supper then went to bed.

Pugs are creatures of habit and hate change.

Dog bed: $20. Rug in living room: $40. Dog couch: $25.
A tiny piece of blanket to sleep on: priceless

An agile Pickle

For the first four weeks of dog agility class, my little black Pug wasn't very thrilled about it.

There were times I thought about staying home because she hated it so much.

But we soldiered on, going every week, even though her tail was down and she acted scared of everything.

Last night, for the first time in a month, I took her leash off of her and we ran the agility course.

She did amazing!

The first run through she did pretty good. Like I told the instructor, her biggest flaw is that she doesn't listen to me off-leash. I don't know how many times I chased her through my neighborhood in the past year when she bolted out the door.

The second time we went off leash was a little rougher, but funny.

At the end of the night, Pickles the black Pug was tired. She sat down in the middle of the course. She went to the stairs to try to leave. If she wanted to sniff a spot five feet away, she did.

And when the instructor and I tried to get her attention, she ran to us wagging her tail. Like, 'Oh, I remember what I'm supposed to be doing!'

My Pickle has the attention span of a gnat. And, it's totally adorable.

It's also her job to tell every single person and every single dog hello in class.

I call her the welcoming committee. She's pretty good at her job.