All I've done is fight with doctors, their offices, insurance companies, drug companies and pharmacists.
(The thing is, I'm not going to babysit you. If you want to ignore me, that's fine. I'll find someone else who wants my money and my defective colon.)
I fired a lot of people. No one was really spared from my firing spree over the past year, and many of those severed relationships died ugly, loud and unglorified deaths. My claws and fangs came out a few times when I felt like it was necessary to unleash those.
Saying that I have not had a record year is an understatement.
I could go into more details, but I promise you, you do not want to know what doctor's appointments, specialists appointments and appointments with surgeons are like when your colon is being a butt.
It is not fun. I'm thankful that it is not life threatening, I'M SO THANKFUL FOR THAT, but I'm also irritated because this problem is irritating.
Anyway, part of not having a record year involves finding something to smile about. You guys, life is not always pretty. In fact, a lot of the time, it just sucks.
Since I found out what my health problems are a couple of months ago, I've been trying to take some time out of each day to find happiness.
One of the things that I've found a lot of happiness in is make up.
It started out a few months ago. On Reddit, I found some subreddits that talk about make up organization and how to apply it.
I started reading about the brands that people are trying, and making mental notes of what brands I want to try.
So far, I love Laura Geller for foundation and blush. I found some cool Mally eye make up that's way too glitzy for me, but I still wear it and feel like a rockstar while doing so.
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I was on the floor with the twins last week. My glasses were off. Little curly-haired girl laid down beside me, right in my face.
We have this ritual. We go nose to nose, and I ask her how close we are.
On a scale of one to 10, little curly-haired girl, how close would you say we are? Like a nine? A 10? We're pretty close, right?
She always giggles and says: "I don't know Monica. I don't know."
Anyway, little K told me to close my eyes last week, so I did.
"Monica, you got pretty eyes."
I turned into a giant pile of goo and my heart melted all over the floor.
I was wearing the glitzy Mally eye make up.
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When I got back from Saint Louie, I kneeled and the twins came and hugged me.
It was a curly-haired girl, red-haired girl, baby and Monica sandwich.
I asked little curly-haired girl for a kiss. She said no. She stuck her face out towards mine.
"Nosie."
(Nosey? Nosie? Nose-y? Whatever.)
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I recently found Lipstick Queen's Hello Sailor and Frog Prince lipsticks.
Oh my God. Hello Sailor will change your life.
I also bought IT Cosmetics highlighter. I don't totally understand why people use it or what it does to your face, but I apply it like people on Reddit say to.
So far, I like playing with make up. I don't always get it right, and I will never look good in blues or purples.
(Speaking of those colors, I'm trying to control the impulse to buy that beautiful Tarte eyeshadow, just because it's in such a beautiful case.)
I was never really brave enough or confident enough to experiment with make up in my 20s.
There's a huge change in your attitude when you hit 30. I have a lot of confidence now that I never did before. I know how to stand up for myself, and I'm not afraid to do it if I have to.
My claws and fangs are on standby.
I've also learned in my 30s that no one else in the world is going to stick up for me (except maybe Mom).
It's my job to stick up for me.
I'm getting really good at that job.
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