Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Funnies

This part of the home buying process isn't for the faint of heart.

Repairs need to be made, inspections are done, paperwork needs to be signed, and underwriters who probably don't even live in my state are dictating what is and isn't happening in my life right now.

Sigh.

I was asked this week what kind of pipes are in my house.

Um, I don't know. Round ones?

This is getting on my nerves. Some of it's funny, though.

In order for this process to move forward, I have to do the following things:
  • Sign papers promising I'm not a terrorist.
  • Sign papers to say I've never committed arson or purposely written bad checks.
  • Give details about my life, such as what kind of dog I have, where my washer and dryer is in my house, and what kind of education I have to total strangers.
  • Give details about whether my vehicle is paid off or not. 
  • Promise to not have a full-time butler or maid living with me (ha!).
  • Sign papers to say I haven't been jailed for the past few years.

So basically, if you're a terrorist with a dog who commits arson and you have a butler or maid, you're totally screwed. You're probably going to live in an apartment, not a house, for the rest of your life.

On a happier, not so sarcastic note, I picked out paint colors. We're doing a nice neutral color in most of the rooms, but we're going a little crazy in the dining room. 

I'll leave you on a cliffhanger here and won't disclose the color.

Less than three weeks until I get this house, people!

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