Bossypants

I needed some reading material for my travels over the past week.

The book had to be small enough to fit in my purse, so the Harry Potter book that I'm reading is automatically out.

I also wanted something light to read, so Dan Brown's newest book that's sitting on my bookshelf was also ruled out.

Hmm. What should I read on the plane?

I was shopping and came across Tina Fey's "Bossypants." I can't even begin to explain how amazing it is.

First off, I love Tina Fey. She's hilarious and the book is wonderful.

I tore off pieces of paper to bookmark places in the book I wanted to quote.

The first part I loved is about a page long. She talks about how awkward it is to get a manicure for the first time.

"Now that you've radically embarrassed yourself, you are ready to squeeze into a seat at a tiny table and basically hold hands with a stranger for twenty minutes. That really is the craziest thing the first few times  you go, getting used to passively flopping your hands into another woman's hands. It's like something they'd make you do at a summer camp as a trust-building exercise, I assume."

Loyal blog readers (hi Mom and Dad!) might remember that I don't really like getting manicures, either. 

At least I'm not the only one who thinks it's really weird.

Other quotes from the book:

"You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go."

"With that exchange, a cosmic shift took place. Amy made it clear that she wasn't there to be cute. She wasn't there to play wives and girlfriends in the boys' scenes. She was there to do what she wanted to do and she did not fucking care if you liked it."

"Yes. We don't fucking care if you like it."

"My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne."

"Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue. In what other profession would you brag about not knowing stuff?  'I'm not one of those fancy Harvard heart surgeons. I'm just an unlicensed plumber with a dream and I'd like to cut your chest open.' The crowd cheers."

"When people say, 'You really, really must' do something, it means you don't really have to do it."

"When it's true, it doesn't need to be said."

"Why not do both, like everybody else in the history of earth? Because, as I think we have established in this book, things most people do naturally are often inexplicably difficult for me."