Lost!

We finished watching Lost last night.

I could say more about the ending, and how many things I didn't see coming, but I won't.

Here are some more quotes:

"What makes you think letting go is so easy?"
"It's not. I don't even know how to do it myself."

"I can help you. I wished you believed me."

"I love you in different ways."

"It was always supposed to be you. I see that now."

"Maybe this is happening for a reason. Maybe you're supposed to fix me."

"We're all flawed."

"I want you to have the one thing I was never given - a choice."

"Aren't you afraid?"
"What's the point of being afraid?"

"We're the ones who can't move on."

"I'm supposed to trust you."
"It's a good idea you do, because I have no idea where we're going."

"Maybe that's the point. Maybe I'm supposed to let go."

"There's a difference between doing nothing and waiting."

"I don't know what I felt."
"Yes you do. You felt love."

"Whatever you think you're looking for you need to stop looking for it."

"It doesn't seem like a choice."

"There's always a choice."

"You're not the only one who's lost someone."

A few more quotes.

We're on Season 6 of Lost. I'm going to be sad when this is over.

Here are some more Lost quotes for you.

"I hope you find what you're looking for."

"I came back here because I was broken. I was stupid enough to think this place could fix me."

"I didn't tell you I was coming here because I didn't want you to see me fail."

"In my eyes you can never fail."

"I'm not the one that needs to be rescued."

"Shouldn't we be encouraging the ones with ambition?"

"I know you've given up but I refuse to."

"Nothing's irreversible."

"I got past the denial and went back to living the life I used to."

"What I am is lost."

"I don't want to spend my life waiting for a miracle to happen."

"Miracles do happen."

Riddle.

Riddle: Why am I wearing long sleeves in July?

Answer: I'm trying to hide gnarly looking bruises on my arm.

No, I didn't get in a fight or lose a bet. What did I do to deserve bruises and pain?

I tried to give blood yesterday. The word 'tried' is important in that sentence because I didn't really succeed.

I'm still scratching my head at how I failed at trying to do something positive. I'm getting ahead of myself here. Let's start from the beginning.

I worked out like a boss on Wednesday night. I sweated my little heart out at the gym and felt pretty fantastic afterward. Then on Thursday morning, I read in the paper about a blood drive that was going on right by my casa.

I figured I'd stop on my lunch break and try to do something good. Why not?

After about an hour of filling out forms and telling numerous people that I probably don't have Malaria, I hopped up on a table, thinking that I would only be there a few minutes.

The nurse came over and poked around on my arm with her fingers.

Then she poked some more.

Do you drink a lot of water during the day?

Why yes, I do, I told her. I mostly stopped drinking caffeine and I chug water all day every day.

Next question she wanted to know: Do you sweat a lot?

I thought for a minute. No, not really.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm sure, but I did work out the night before.

The nurse told me apparently I sweated all the water out of my body and she couldn't find a vein. Then she found it, then it was small, then she lost it, then she found it again.

A pinch and a poke later, I chilled out and thought about other things. I figured it'd only be a few minutes.

The nurse came over again, told me that my vein moved and there was no blood coming out.

Um, what? I was sitting still and I swear I didn't move an inch.

After more poking and prodding, she asked me how I was squeezing the stress ball. I showed her, then she got mad at me for using my arm and my fingers (apparently you're supposed to use only your fingers).

At this point, she gave up, took the needle out of my arm, showed me a blood clot (I have no idea if that's good or bad) and told me to hold a bandage up against my arm.

You're going to have a pretty good bruise, she said.

It didn't really hurt, so I just ignored that comment.

I've gave blood in college frequently because I knew someone whose life depended on it. I never bruised or had any complications, so I brushed off what the nurse told me. Psh, what does she know anyway?

A day later, let's just say that she was right. That bruise is pretty gross looking, hence the long-sleeved shirt in July.

Oh well. I can laugh at the fact that I tried to do something good and failed. Also, I tried to do something good and in return, it feels like someone just shot me in the arm.

Ha, ha.

I signed up to give blood one more time. If it doesn't go well next time, I might have to retire from this for good.

This was a lot easier to do 10 years ago.

Also, although I failed, it was a good excuse to eat a candy bar and not work out for a day.

(Editor's note: I wrote this two days ago. The bruise has only gotten worse since then, and is kind of swollen. I'm so talented, I screw up royally without even realizing it...)

Healthy!

I would describe my personality as somewhat pessimistic. In whatever situation I'm in, I always assume the worst possible thing.

I'm sometimes an awesome person to be around. (Sarcasm.)

I had some lingering questions regarding my health that have been bugging me recently. I just assumed the worst and put off making a doctor's appointment. 

But you know, sometimes life involves doing things you don't want to do. After my doctor came in the room, she told me several times that I've lost a "significant" amount of weight and that my blood pressure was much better.

Other than some allergy issues, there's nothing wrong with me.

Look at me, being all healthy and stuff!

There was not an ounce of negativity during the appointment. Just, you're doing good with everything and keep up the great work.

Look at me, being an adult and fixing my problems!

This is a big deal. I could try to explain it to everyone, but I'm not sure I can get across how important this is to me. 

I went to this same doctor's office right after I moved back to my hometown in 2011. As in, I quit my job, moved back to my hometown without a job, then went to a doctor who said hey, you've got some issues!

You could say that I was a little stressed out about life and there were several things about me that were not healthy.

But the cool thing about life? You can fix the stuff you've broken along the way.

My New Year's resolution this year was to be healthy. That resolution was kind of broken when I landed in a doctor's office on Jan. 5 with bronchitis, but I figured it was a good goal to work to. 

I'm getting to the point where I almost have no lingering health problems.

Smile!

Where would I be without my books?

Picture this: A recent college graduate is finally living in her first grown up apartment.

It's late, dark outside, and the town is currently in a pretty severe thunderstorm. Thunder cracks in the distance, lightning dances in the sky, and rain is pouring down.

The book I was reading at the time was one of Dan Brown's books. I can't tell you which one, because they're all amazing and I've enjoyed them all.

Anyway, there's a scene in the book where the main character (Oh, Robert Langdon, I miss you) is getting chased around a huge dark room by a bad guy.

There's a cell phone, of course, that goes off, so Robert chucks it across the room so the bad guy can't come after the light of the phone.

It's a stressful scene involving someone wanting to kill my beloved Robert Langdon.

Can you imagine how scary that would be? To be in a huge room with no lights, tippy-toeing your way around, trying not to breathe too loud because if you do, you'd die?

While reading that scene, a higher power decided to mess with me that night and my apartment lost electricity.

That's right, I was reading about an attempted murder happening in the dark while the lights went off in my apartment.

I can count the number of times I've truly been scared in my life on one hand, and that was one of them.

I'm telling you this because I can across a list on Buzzfeed appropriately titled "29 Reasons Reading Will Ruin Your Life."

It's funny. And kind of true.

No. 13: When you read a monumental moment in a book (death scene, break up, ect) and you're freaking out but NO ONE UNDERSTANDS.

My power going out story is one of my favorite stories to tell, but I don't think anyone can really relate to how scary it was.

I thought I was a goner.

Ha, ha.

No. 27: When people have the nerve to say that movies are better?  You're not just wrong, you're stupid.

Link from Buzzfeed: 29 Reasons Reading Will Ruin Your Life

Incentives

I'm going to start giving myself incentives. 

For every mile I work out, I'm going to put a penny into a jar. In a month's time, if I have 100 pennies, I'm going to give myself $100 to spend on something that's totally useless.

It started yesterday. I put two pennies into a jar. My normal workout routine is three miles on a combination of the elliptical, ski machine and treadmill a few times a week.

But, people? That's not going to get me 100 miles in a month. I need to up the ante here.

I've thought about morning workout or walks. The keyword there is thought, because I'm most definitely not a morning person. 

Hm. 

Maybe instead of blowing $100 on stupid stuff every month, I'll wait a few months and finally buy a new TV.

The one I'm looking at is only $400. 

I guess I'm getting ready to make a promise to myself on my blog. By the end of November, I will have exercised 400 miles.

And then I'll buy myself a new TV and stop hitting the one that I currently have to try to get it to work.

Two miles down, 398 to go. 

What if you were blessed?

Season 5 of Lost was my favorite season so far. We'll see what the next and last season holds.

Until then, here are some more quotes.

There's something different about you."
"I have a purpose now."

"I'm not afraid of anything you can do."

"This is our destiny."

"Everyone answers to someone."

"What's done is done."

"I know you don't believe in me but I need them to."

"Are you sure I'm the one who doesn't believe in you?"

"Never in my life have I felt so right."

"What if you weren't cursed? What if you were blessed?"

"I'm tired of waiting."